Offering Constructive And Respectful Feedback At Work
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Leadership

  • Matt Hendershott
  • Leadership, Negotiation
  • October 12, 2022

Offering Constructive And Respectful Feedback At Work

We all want to grow as people, and our professional lives are no exception. We desire success and to feel valued, but we can’t do it alone. Feedback from others helps us improve and see things from a different perspective. Yet it isn’t always easy delivering or receiving feedback. Our egos ofttimes get in the way and make it difficult to accept criticism, and it’s hard to strike a delicate balance of offering helpful feedback that doesn’t go too far.

Delivering effective and assistive feedback is something every leader needs to master. But even if you aren’t in a leadership role, if you work with other people, you’ll eventually have to offer feedback. Make sure the feedback you offer is both helpful and respectful by following these tenets.

“We all need people who will give us feedback. That’s how we improve.” -Bill Gates

Choose the right time

Feedback is often in reaction to some sort of mistake, and sometimes, those mistakes are big ones. But don’t react in the heat of the moment, and remember that hindsight is 20/20.

Monica Torres writes about the balance between reacting too soon, while emotions are raw and too late, where the colleague might not learn the lesson or both parties will remain stressed. It’s important to take time to find perspective, give the other person an opportunity to correct their mistake in their own ways, and find the right way to address the person.

Be emphatic and consider what the other person is going through. They may not be in the headspace to take your feedback to heart if it’s too soon. If possible, provide the necessary feedback in private. A good way for your thoughts to fall on unlistening ears is to make someone feel called out in front of the team.

“Put things into perspective so that you can have the discussion in a better mood.” –Andres Lares

Focus on the issues and offer solutions

Even when you choose the right time and place, it can still be difficult communicating your feedback. People are often afraid of criticism, and it’s incredibly easy to phrase something in a way that makes the other person defensive.

CNBC Make It’s Aditi Shrikant suggests avoiding any phrasing that implies blame. The words you pick should include encouragement, so avoid phrases like “You should have..” or “If I were you…”

Make sure to focus on the specific issues both for clarity and to prevent someone from getting defensive. They’ll know the exact issue you’d like to discuss, and by focusing on the issue instead of them as a person, they’ll be much more receptive.

“If you are the feedback recipient and someone is pointing out an error or mistake but you’re not really clear on what went wrong or what the result was, that’s not really useful.” -Gianna Driver

Finally, make sure to offer solutions as part of your feedback and offer to be a part of that solution. Tangible actions reinforce the idea that an issue is a problem, not a person. And Monica Torres notes that your kindness helps your team member recover after a mistake and prevents them from lashing back.

Create a culture of feedback

Feedback should offer tangible ways to improve and suggestions on what can be done differently. But that feedback will have more impact if it comes from a culture of feedback. A culture where feedback is consistently received—and given—will allow your team to take that feedback to heart with more frequency.

Forbes’ Claire Schmidt suggests that this culture starts from the top. Create channels of feedback, including regular performance reviews, project reviews, anonymous platforms for communication, and surveys. This proves your organization welcomes communication and provides multiple avenues for feedback to be given or received.

Be able to receive feedback

Because a culture of feedback starts from the top, you need to be open to receiving feedback of your own. Someone is much more likely to accept the opinion of someone that listens to them as well.

If you’re in a leadership role, respectfully listening to feedback makes you much more approachable and paints you as an empowering leader, according to SuperBeings’ Dhanashree Jadhav. But even if you aren’t in a leadership role, the same philosophy applies. A team member is going to be more accommodating and collaborative if you’ve shown a pattern of thoughtfulness in the past, and they’ll know your feedback is from a place of respect.

It’s easy to view feedback as an attack or criticism, but by helping create the right culture, you’ll know it comes from a good place.

Wrap up

By choosing your moments, focusing on actions, and offering solutions, you’ll offer effective feedback that won’t come across as an attack. By building a culture of feedback and being open to feedback of your own, you’ll create an atmosphere of camaraderie where team members aren’t afraid of growth opportunities. We all want to improve. Sometimes, it just takes a friendly peer to figure out how.

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  • Matt Hendershott
  • Confidence, Leadership, Mental Health
  • September 28, 2022

Ditch These Phrases To Become More Confident

Whether you’re applying for your first job, branching out into a career change, or you’re an experienced leader, confidence is crucial in establishing yourself in your career. Becoming truly confident in your work life can be a lifelong process, but there are small steps you can take right now to lay the necessary foundation.

By doing something as simple as self-monitoring the language you use on a daily basis, you can avoid phrases that portray a lack of confidence. When you use the right language, not only will you appear confident to others, but you’ll convince yourself as well.

Ladder’s Kaitlyn McInnis, Forbes’ Christine Comaford, Inc’s Marla Tabaka, and CNBC Make It’s Kathy and Ross Petras cited some key phrases to ditch in order to exemplify confidence. We’ll categorize them and highlight a few of the most egregious examples.

Verbal qualifiers

“Almost: “I think I’ve said almost everything about that.”” -Christine Comaford

The core of what you’re saying can express your idea effectively, but a single word or innocuous phrase will take the power away from your message. In the above example, the speaker could have finished strong, but the phrase “I think” and the word “almost” take the wind out of the sails.

Qualifying words like the two above lead to being perceived as a weak leader or speaker. When you use these words, you aren’t owning the statement you’re making, and you’re disconnecting from your feelings, according to Christine Comaford. These words take the authority away from the speaker, making you appear weaker.

Med School Insiders lists adding “Does that make sense?”, “Know what I mean?”, and “I dunno” as other common qualifiers nervous speakers will add to the end of their ideas that express a lack of confidence.

Simply removing the qualifiers keeps the core of your message intact while making it appear stronger. Marla Tabaka provides the following:

“I just feel like this is an important problem for us to explore.” vs. “This is an important problem for us to explore.”

Which sounds more confident to you?

Being indirect or cliched

“I just wanted to check in…” – Kaitlyn McInnis

No matter who you’re speaking to, you have agency. While you should always be respectful, just because you aren’t in a position of power doesn’t mean you have to be meek. Make the most of your time by speaking clearly and confidently.

Opening an email with “I just wanted to check in” and closing with “Looking forward to hearing from you” are common cliches that Kaitlyn McInnis says to avoid. These phrases, and the ones like them, are dancing around the subject instead of getting to the heart of the matter. These phrases can even make it sound like you’re apologizing for simply requesting information or a follow-up.

“I hope this email finds you well” is another fan non-favorite. Not only is it a massive cliché, but no one actually talks like this. It’s a greeting of the inexperienced. A simple “good wishes” or “I hope you’re having a great day” feels more natural and sincere.

Over apologizing

“Sorry to bother you, but…”- Kathy and Ross Petras

Tying into the above point, the problem with many of these words in phrases is that they appear overly apologetic. You shouldn’t feel like you’re impeding on someone’s time with a necessary request.

Apologizing when necessary is something everyone should strive for, but when you’re following up or asking for clarity, you shouldn’t feel excusatory.

Kaitlyn McInnis suggests finding ways to turn an apology into a thank you. If it took you a while to respond to an email, thank the sender for their patience rather than apologize for the tardiness. We all have things come up, and everyone should be willing to forgive the occasional late email.

“Sorry to bother you” is one of the most guilty examples. Kathy and Ross Petras say that you can appear much more confident and less self-deprecating with a simple “excuse me.” It’s a polite way to garner attention without belittling yourself. Remember—being direct is a sign of confidence!

Wrap up

We all fall victim to these weak phrases, and some of them are so ingrained in our vocabulary that we don’t even realize it! Take some time to self-reflect and analyze your language choices. You can even go back to previous emails or texts to see if you’re guilty of these practices. Avoid qualifying language, be direct and sincere, and don’t apologize simply for existing. These small steps will go far in making you sound confident to your peers and, with luck, yourself!

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  • GR8TR Today Magazine
  • Interviews, Leadership, NexGoal Community, Recruiting
  • April 4, 2022

The Athlete Advantage For Your Recruiting Needs

Ron McDaniel of GR8TR Today Magazine interviewed NexGoal CEO Kevin Dahl regarding the firm’s recent success and plans for the future.

Following a 14-year professional hockey career that spanned the NHL and the Olympics, Kevin Dahl found himself quickly transitioning to the entrepreneurial world. In 2009, he co-founded NexGoal, a national recruiting firm with a niche in finding and placing former athletes from all levels of competition into new careers.

NexGoal works directly with both clients and candidates to take the stress out of the job search for all parties involved. Many of their corporate clients share the belief that individuals who exhibit the core values of confidence, persistence, time management, and coachability make up their best employees.

Mike Stone (L) of PAFI and Kevin Dahl (R) at the NHL Alumni Symposium.

Recently, I had the opportunity to interview Kevin and learn more about NexGoal’s recent success and what’s in store for 2022 and beyond.

Question: How has your athletic experience translated into the business world? How have you leveraged your experience as a professional athlete towards a career in recruiting?

Kevin: I found my journey in entrepreneurship to be similar to my athletic career in terms of the effort required and the adversity I faced. Athletes need persistence, work ethic, drive, leadership, and coachability to be successful at their chosen sport, and those same tenets are valuable in the business world.

My hockey tenure also taught me how to manage people and teammates effectively and what it truly means to be a part of a team. The importance of building a winning team full of true competitors is equally as vital as with any sports team. Hockey is a long season that, like recruiting, requires a consistent, daily effort.

Recruiting is about attention to detail, which plays a major role when comparing one’s natural ability with the intentionality and effort it takes to succeed. Winning in sports AND being on a good team requires a lot of concentration on small details. Natural ability alone can only get you so far but combined with the hunger to learn and ‘practice makes perfect’ mentality, the sky’s the limit.

Question: What first attracted you to starting NexGoal?

Kevin: When I retired from the game and started looking for jobs I had to go through the experience of putting together a resume and reaching out to people to help me. I didn’t have a lot of experience in those areas and learned there were a lot of athletes in the same boat.

After my experience in putting together a resume and putting my skills on paper without real-world experience, I realized I could help others do the same. That eventually led to starting NexGoal.

Question: What were the greatest challenges you faced working in recruiting as a result of COVID-19? What adjustments have you made in lieu of remote and hybrid workplaces?

Kevin: COVID-19 caused a lot of industries to rethink how they conducted their day-to-day business, and we were no exception. Through trial-and-error, we learned how to rely on technology like Zoom and adapt to our team working remotely. We were able to adapt to a new way of working with zero turnover. Because we had first-hand experience, our recruiting team could relate to organizational needs, and we knew what our clients were looking for.

The pandemic caused what many call the “Great Resignation,” where workers reevaluated their careers to find something that better aligned with their values. Our own research found that a good culture and feeling valued made workers the happiest, so we’ve become more thorough in our initial conversations and write-ups with new clients.

Question: In what industries and positions has NexGoal experienced your greatest growth?

Kevin Dahl, NexGoal

Kevin: We reinvented our client list in wake of the pandemic. Based on our own experience, we knew what changes companies needed to make to survive the pandemic. We researched specific industries that were successfully remotely operating and looking to grow, and we learned which industries were putting hiring on hold. We’d previously had success with the Medical Device and Mortgage/Title industries. These industries adapted to the pandemic well, so we focused our energy on working with them. Our efforts led to great success.

Question: What sets NexGoal apart from its competitors?

Kevin: At the end of the day, our Recruiting Process is what sets us apart. We’re thorough in researching our client partners and our job seekers, and we have a scout’s eye for talent. This business is about building strong relationships, and our clients keep coming back to us. We’ve consistently received great testimonials from our partners.

“Since becoming a partner to assist us with our recruiting needs, NexGoal has done an excellent job identifying talent for our organization that aligns with our company culture, our values, and what our customers have come to expect from our sales team!”

Steve Wilson, US National Sales Manager, A Global Medical Device Company

Question: Why do clients always stay with NexGoal for a long period of time?

Kevin: Our clients stay with us for long periods of time, some over ten years, and many of our placed employees remain with our clients to this day. We became a true partner in their recruiting efforts.

This is where the athlete’s mindset comes into play. We’re competitive and persistent in our recruiting efforts, and we don’t settle for anything less than the best.

Question: Beyond recruiting, are there any resources you provide for job-seekers and employers alike?

Kevin: Yes! We take pride in keeping our audience up-to-date with all the latest hiring and workforce trends. From tips and tools to enhance job-seekers’ resumes, cover letters, interview
techniques (and more), to our guiding principles for employers monitoring remote/hybrid work, leadership, and company culture, you won’t want to miss what we have in store for 2022! Be sure to visit our Career Advice Library and sign up for our Job-Seeker and Employer eNewsletters.

Question: Where can people learn more about you and get connected with NexGoal Recruiting?

Kevin: You can learn more about NexGoal and get in touch with our recruiting team via this Contact Form. Find us on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and more here.

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  • Matt Hendershott
  • Career Advice, Career Growth, Confidence, Interviews, Job Search Tips, Leadership
  • January 19, 2022

How To Become An Enthralling Storyteller

At my last job, I was a senior assistant at a finance company. The boss, Mr. Gould, was tall, kinda short. Lightish-dark hair. I remember he had this little dog he would bring into the office named Horton. Or was it Morton? Anyway, I’m sorry, what was the question?

If you’ve made it past this nonsensical anecdote, bravo! A well-told story can leave an impression on your audience and create personal investment. But a poorly-told story, like the one above, incites confusion and boredom. Bestselling author Kindra Hall believes good storytellers are able to build a connection and differentiate themselves from the competition.

“Given a choice between listening to statistics or facts or listening to a story, people will always choose a story. And stories stick with them longer.” -Kindra Hall

Whether you’re interviewing for a new job or becoming a leader in your field, the ability to be a good storyteller is crucial to succeeding in the business world. If you’re looking to enhance your oratory skills with a sense of eloquence and excitement, follow these storytelling cues.

Have a point

A good story leaves an imprint because it has a purpose. No matter how elegant you tell your tale, no one will be interested if the story doesn’t have meaning. The time you found the last bag of oyster crackers at Aldi won’t hold up next to the Iliad.

Skillshare Blog believes there should be a payoff for the listener, not just the storyteller. Even if it isn’t known to the audience until the end of the tale, make sure there is a central message somewhere in your story.

Cut the bloat

Think of a time someone bored you with a story you weren’t interested in. Chances are, the story droned on, and on, and on. One of the classic blunders used by less-proficient storytellers is bogging the story down with too many unnecessary details. In the example story at the top of this article, my story about a previous job focused far too much energy on the boss’ appearance and little details about his life.

Forbes Lisa Christen reminds us of the classic sad short story “For sale: baby shoes, never worn.” In just six words, we have a full story. Let every individual word drive the story forward while trusting the audience to be able to fill in the blanks. Your audience is smart but uninformed; they’ll be able to understand your meanings.

While some background information is required, keep it to the necessary bits only, reminds Anett Grant of Fast Company.

“[S]et the scene for your audience in the most concise way possible, telling them only what they need to know to comprehend your key takeaway.” -Anett Grant

Hit emotional beats

If your chronicle is going to stay in the audiences’ mind, it needs to be more than hard facts. The reason you tell a story is to foster a connection, and simply providing the who/what/where/when doesn’t cut it.

Kindra Hall believes a successful story has four components: an identifiable character, authentic emotion, a moment, and specific (relevant!) details. This character (often you!) should experience real emotions and have a defining moment, ie the purpose of the story.

Think in terms of an interviewer asking you a challenge you’ve overcome in the workplace. You’ll leave a long-lasting impression if the story is personal and authentic. Don’t just hit the bullet points; really try to highlight the conflict and how you overcame it. Skillshare Blog points out that the conflict is what keeps an audience engaged.

“An easy and linear path to the finish line isn’t going to keep your audience engaged. Instead, you want your characters to face obstacles—and a decent amount of drama—as they journey on their path.”- Skillshare Blog

You’ll be much more likely to get a follow-up call if your story resonates with the hiring managers.

Keep it simple

Tying back to the idea your story should have a point, once you’ve made that point it’s okay to end the story. Anett Grant reminds us that humans have a short attention span; they say to keep the story like a shot clock in basketball. Get your points across and move on. There is no faster way to lose your audience than to ramble on and have them zone out and forget the point you were making.

Practice

While storytelling may not be the same as public speaking, a fear of many, many of the principles remain the same. Practice your delivery at home while following the above advice. Repetition leads to comfort and confidence. Whether your audience is one person or one hundred, you’ll be able to self-scout and recognize what is and isn’t working.

Skillshare Blog further recommends looking to those who have mastered the art of storytelling to improve. Think of your favorite storytellers and read or listen to their tales. Ask yourself why the story works and how you can adapt those techniques yourself.

Wrap up

Storytelling is a vital skill to master for your professional career. As a job seeker, it will allow you to stick in the hiring manager’s mind after the interview, leading to more follow-ups. As a leader, you’ll find yourself connecting with your team and inspiring them to new heights. It can allow you to resonate with customers, leading to more sales and satisfied clients. Some people are natural storytellers, but with a little effort, anyone can become a masterful storyteller.

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  • Matt Hendershott
  • Culture, For Employers, Job Search Tips, Leadership, Remote Work
  • January 12, 2022

How To Host More Efficient Meetings

Some people adore workplace meetings as a chance to communicate ideas, collaborate on projects, or simply interact with their coworkers. But for many, workplace meetings can be a source of stress. They can represent a momentum-killer and slow down one’s work process or cause anxiety about what the meeting might be about. In the world of remote work, this stress can be tenfold. After all, if you’re working in your pajamas, there better be a good reason for you to turn on the camera.

MIT Sloan’s Steven G. Rogelberg’s research suggests that a mere 50% of meeting time is used efficiently, and that number plummets even further for remote meetings. Luckily, Rogelberg believes it’s easy to host more efficient meetings.

“The good news is that there’s an evidence-based path forward based on more than 20 years of research on meetings and teams. Meeting science has yielded key insights that can be incredibly helpful to meeting leaders, especially during this challenging time that is marked by an increase in remote meetings.” –Rogelberg

Meetings are a great way to get your team motivated and cohesive and to complete chief objectives, but it’s important to make your meetings efficient. We’ll follow Business Made Simple’s model of what to do before, during, and after your meeting so you can host the most impactful meetings.

Before the meeting

The most vital step before hosting a meeting is to ask yourself whether something even needs to be a meeting. We’ve all experienced a “meeting” that could have been a quick email or impromptu conversation.

Don’t have a meeting for the sake of having a meeting, recommends Workrowd. For example, if you’re just sharing information rather than having a discussion, an email can suffice. You want to respect everyone’s time.

Once you’ve determined you do need to host a meeting, make sure you invite the people that need to be there. Overcrowding is the enemy of hosting an efficient meeting, especially in a remote setting. Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos suggests the “two-pizza” rule for hosting meetings, meaning if two pizzas wouldn’t feed everyone in the meeting, you’ve invited too many people. This isn’t a direct amount, as I could put away a decent amount of pizza if pressed, but the concept is wise. Invite only those who need to be there, and take minutes that can be sent to anyone else.

Of course, to keep to these minutes you’ll want to create an agenda to stick to. Using an agenda lets employees know what the meeting is about and makes it easier to stick to a timetable. Business Made Simple also suggests creating an overall objective. Without trying to achieve a tangible result, attendees can feel that their time was wasted. If people know the purpose of the meeting and the goals to be met, it makes the time feel much more valuable.

During the meeting

Once the meeting begins, you need to keep things focused and efficient. Make sure to have someone taking notes to keep those outside the meeting in the loop. A good set of notes provides an excellent reference, but without a dedicated note-taker, you may miss important details.

“Without a designated note-taker, everyone has pieces of the meeting notes, but no one has the full picture.”-Business Made Simple

If you’re leading the meeting, you need to know how to facilitate and keep things flowing well. Recall that you need to respect peoples’ time. A facilitator should know when to change topics, circle back to important conversation points, and limit small talk. This keeps the meeting on track and minimizes the amount of downtime. By previously creating an agenda and objective, the facilitator’s job is much easier once the meeting begins.

Conversely, allow catchup time to make sure everyone is on the same page. Owl Lab’s Katherine Boyarsky suggests giving some time at the beginning of the meeting for people to briefly chat and introduce themselves, especially in remote settings. This not only provides an opportunity for workers to connect with one another but increases their visibility. A seen worker is more likely to participate and feel that their voice is heard while discussing crucial topics. Balancing the social factor is tricky but necessary to host a good meeting.

After the meeting

Just because the meeting is over doesn’t mean the fun is over. Some of the most important work comes once everyone has gone back to their desk or resumed their normal duties.

Hopefully, you were able to get good notes. By having a dedicated note-taker during the meeting, you’ll be able to easily reference action points and get your plans in gear. Follow up immediately while things are fresh to keep the momentum rolling, writes Business Made Simple. By keeping your meeting solution-oriented, you can start taking steps to implement your chosen solutions. Workrowd believes that even if you don’t settle on a single solution, narrowing down your options is still a win.

Because you took good notes, you’ll want to get the meeting summary to those that need them. This can take many forms: a direct copy of the note-taker’s notes, a simple summary paragraph or bulleted list, or a recording if the meeting was virtual.

Finally, after your meeting, be open to feedback on how to improve. Not every meeting will run smoothly, and you won’t always meet your objective. People get distracted or may be having a bad day, and that’s okay. The Enterprisers Project’s David Egts suggests to always validate the value of a meeting and look for areas to improve.

Wrap up

Meetings are necessary to create optimized workplace solutions and to collaborate with your team, and sometimes you need to directly look at someone to get the best feedback. But all meetings aren’t created equally, and not every conversation needs to be an official ‘on-the-docket’ meeting. By preparing for every step of your meeting, you can be sure to get the best and most efficient results. Want to make sure a meeting is the right call? Atlassian offers a helpful flowchart to see if your needs are best met by a meeting here.

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NexGoal is a corporate recruiting firm placing athletes and job seekers with the athlete mindset in their next career.

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